Eight Pre-Wedding Fights and How to Avoid Them

When planning a social event like a wedding, so many things are involved in putting together a “perfect” event. And as humans, conflicts are bound to occur. What matters most is how the issues that crop up during planning are handled and resolved. For the wedding couple, there are going to be a lot of things to disagree about. 

However, do not let your differences ruin the joy and elegance that accompanies a typical wedding. Sit back and read through some of the fights I have identified you may have with your spouse and learn to resolve them before they lead to bigger issues after your big day. Happy planning!

• GUEST LIST – is anyone of you inviting more guests than the other without chipping in as much money? Is the groom’s family guest list exceeding limits? Do you prefer a small wedding gathering while your bride insists on a mammoth crowd? This is may be a prototype for future financial dealings. Be business-like and limit costs. Open communication lines between you and your partner. Let both families chip in money and share the reception costs. As such, everyone gets a say.
• PASSIVE GROOM – basically, the bride is more involved in wedding planning. This leaves the groom with no clue as to how he can get involved and contribute to the planning of his wedding. However, don’t expect too much from the groom; he is a man. He knows nothing about decorations, cakes, dresses and all that. If your husband is interested in such details of wedding planning, count yourself lucky; some men do. Ask him what he is interested in, and get him involved along those lines. If there are underlying issues responsible for his lack of involvement that needs to be addressed, please do so.
• SPENDING SPREE – due to the disparity in individual backgrounds of the couple, there could be conflict of interest. For instance, the bride may want to splurge on her dress while the groom prefers a superb honeymoon. Compromise is very important here. Work out the finances well. The bride needs to be reasonable. Both partners would benefit from the honeymoon while the dress would be worn by the bride for only a few hours in the whole day.
• RELIGIOUS DIFFERENCES – as a personal opinion, get married to someone with a different religious view from yours is stress and much work. How do you intend to bring up your kids? Anyway, that been said, if you have weighed the pros and cons of such union, understand the religious traditions of your partner. If he/she has a very religious family, you may have to face some religious discrimination.
• AESTHETICS – you wanted a groom that would be fully involved in the nitty-gritty of the wedding planning. He is now involved, be thankful for that. Mr Groom wants a purple theme for the whole event while you want gold theme. He doesn’t want to wear a boutonniere but prefers beautiful centerpieces. There is really no need to fight over the aesthetics of the event. You both should sit down and decide on the priorities. What are the most important aspects of the wedding that needs more attention? You could have a different theme for the ceremony and a different theme for the reception, the same way she can wear a dress for the ceremony and change into something else for the reception. Keep in mind that at the end of the day, what would matter most is, you got married.
• THE BRIDEZILLA – each time you go out or alone with your bride, she has nothing to talk about other than this upcoming wedding. The girl that once enjoyed watching the Premier League matches with you now rescind into a couch to read bridal magazines. She would find a way of redirecting neutral conversations to wedding planning. At this point, it seems the wedding planning is more important to her than the relationship. You would wonder if the wedding planning can actually surface without a relationship in the first instance. Bride, there is no wedding planning without a relationship. Take time out with your partner without discussing wedding related issues.
• THE EX-FACTOR – Is your man planning to invite an ex-girlfriend or a female co-worker he knows has a crush on him? You need to grow up! You have been chosen over the other girls around; no need to worry yourself about the losers. In fact, you have won the battle. If there are no previous issues of distrust, there is really nothing to fight over. Have a talk with your partner about it openly without confrontation.
• FRIENDSHIPS – the choice of friends could cause rancor between couples if the issue is not treated maturely. As a matter of fact, you don’t really have to like your partner’s friends; just treat them with cordiality. Is he choosing his high school jerky as best man who is more concerned about getting drunk before the ceremony? Not to worry. Be supportive and sensitive. They may be quite close and he couldn’t just think of a better friend to involve. If the best man or a groomsman has a moral issue like drinking, assign another responsible or older man to be around them throughout the event.